So glad no one is reading, no one will see I'm pleading

I've tried and tried
But clearly I failed
Every night I cried
Everyday you bailed

You said you'd never leave
Said you'd always be there
Your words, I did believe
Now I see you don't care

Excuse me, while I get the door
It's Death, and I know what he came for.

I'm no poet, but I'ma still go for it

UNTITLED
My reason is unknown
I just can't get it right
I'm left here on my own
Too tired to put up a fight

No one has my back
No one is on my side
My will is about to crack
All I have left is pride

I don't know what keeps me going
I can't help but start crying
It's hard to live when knowing
That everyday I feel like dying

But maybe there's something more for me
A silver lining in the clouds
I have know idea what it could be
My screams within, are far too loud

No Title
Where do I belong?
Not here
I knew it all along
No where

The search is futile
Hopeless
Time to rest for awhile
Lifeless

I try to hide
No reason
Can't change the tide
No point

Still No Title

There's the alarm
It's that time again
Another day begins
This cycle needs to end

Everyday is a battle
Some I lose, some I win
But this is a war
One that I am losing

What will it take
To turn this around
Whatever it is
I don't have it

Will I ever find it?
Safe bet is no
The battle's done
The war has just begun

Don't drink, just think

There's nothing left in my cup, I... give... up

Another video for you guys, an incoherent ramble at 2:00





The part about looks, even though what others say and think don't really matter, if they think you're pretty or good looking, then you are to them, and use that to help change your opinion of your own looks. But in the end it's what you think that matters... it was 2:am cut me some slack

Dealin with Stess: The Movie

I decided to make up for my two week absent with a video... enjoy

Let me spin a rhyme or two, I have some poems just for you.

Here's some poems, I feel like poetry

I’ll Ride with You Forever

Ride into the night
Don’t turn back and wonder
Pedal with all your might
Don’t ever call this a blunder

Be free, ride ‘til you’re done
Go out and meet your destiny
Don’t be afraid to run
Just don’t run for all eternity

I am here with you
I will never leave your side
Yes I swear it’s true
I am here for the ride

So go out, ride, and make your own fate
Tell me, and I’ll be sure to save the date.

Starry Skies from the Rooftops

Starry skies look so beautiful
Just you and me laying on this rooftop
It’s times like these that are so wonderful
Watch the world go round like a top

The mystery of life is solved
You and me were meant to be
Let’s get the past mistakes resolved
So we can let our souls be free

So pour your heart out
Tell me your story
Tell me what those tears are about
As we sing ‘Alive with the Glory’

Let’s make our stand here tonight
And let’s take in this beautiful sight

Somewhere I Belong

Every where I go
I long for something more
These people, I do not know
It hurts me right down to the core

I’m waiting for something
Or someone to come along
But I don’t see a happy ending
In this place I don’t belong

Nothing seems right
Everyday I put on a show
I can’t keep up the fight
My despair just seems to grow

So where exactly is this magical place?
But I know for sure it’s not in front of my face.

“Small Things”

The say it’s the small things
The little things in the day
Like when your phone rings
And you know exactly what to say

But the small things can’t out weigh
The big things that go so bad
I can’t keep the demons at bay
Those small things can’t make me glad

It’s hard to see the light
When everything goes wrong
It’s hard to keep up the fight
All you can do is stay strong

I am sick of your fantasies and optimism
I see the world what it is, call it pessimism

On this Island I Make my Stay

Everyday I wake up to a fight
It's like I'm cursed with this blight
No one to my left, no one to my right
Getting out of bed takes all my might

I find there's no where left to run
Doesn't matter, I live in isolation
It may appear like I'm having fun
I just wish I could be done

Done with the bull shit
I am so sick of it
No rest, not even for a bit
My will to go on takes a hit

While I lay down and stare at the ceiling
I realize I can't shake the feeling
That on an island I make my living
I have nothing that's worth giving

So please will just let me be
Unless you're the one here to change me

It's time for me to leave my shell, leave my own personal hell

So I've noticed I write about love, like, relationship, girls, etc etc. But for those that don't know me, I usually fail, miserably. I can go back and site the reasons but I don't see the point. I screwed up, I get it, but now I'm changing. Normally I don't agree with people giving advice who don't follow their own, but by actually writing this blog, and giving advice, what I'm doing is seeing what I have to do. Trust me, all the advice I've given, wasn't just to whoever's reading this, if anyone, but also to myself. In fact it is mostly to myself. There's two people I know that actually read this blog, and one of them reads only when I tell them I have a new one. But what this blog does is it puts what I need to do on to paper (sort of).

I talk about taking chances and risks, especially when dealing with the fairer sex. But Lord knows, when it comes to that, I am the most cautious and terrified person ever. Many refuse to believe it, I come off pretty damn confident. But the truth is, I'm just a good actor. When it comes to the nitty gritty, just me, her, and the things I want to say, I usually stay silent, and regret for a long time. But this year, that's all changing. I'm taking chances; I'm taking risks; I'm living life.

I can honestly look back at my past, and think to myself that I am better today than I was one, two, three years ago. Granted, I still am petrified of telling that someone exactly how I feel, but instead of remaining silent because I don't want to "lose what I have," I am going for it all. You only live once, and it's time to stop living in a shell.

With the support of friends I've stepped outside the shell, and I like what I see. So my advice to the anyone reading this... which is probably no one... my advice is to take a chance. Tell that girl that she's the most amazing girl you've ever met and that everyday is a treat. GO for that job you don't think you can get, just step up, whatever it is. Step up! Guys, we're supposed to make the first move, so make it. She could be waiting for you to say something... I bet she is.

"If there is a decision you need to make that scares you, its okay to make it, its okay to make the jump, there is a net below you, jump."